Pregnancy is treating me well, but that’s not where I want to begin! I want to begin with some shared frustration and encouragement. I also want to share some lessons that I have learned! If a picture was worth a thousand words….
When God repeatedly tells us, “not this time,” we have a choice. We can choose to be angry and let our hearts be chipped away little by little, OR we can choose to believe and have faith that His plan is perfect and true. When our heart belongs to God, He holds it together, no matter how bad it may hurt or how broken it may feel. I HAVE BEEN THERE!
We are made to feel. It’s okay to feel broken, sad and hurt. We all struggle! Sometimes it’s a daily battle/decision to choose heavenly happiness and peace over the cruel emotions of this world. HANG IN THERE friends! Lean on those around you. Be open to encouragement, support and love from people who care. Especially on those days when the last thing you want to hear is, “everything will be okay.” It’s okay to feel, and it’s okay to be needy. BE YOU.
I want to encourage you to daily accept God’s grace and mercy. It’s there, a free gift. I promise His plan is better than our own, as hard as it is to understand sometimes! It always has been for us. He sustains me daily.
I have friends struggling with a lot of different things right now. Whether it be your marriage or relationship, finances/job, infertility, school, just doing grown up things, etc. My advice is to be transparent. Be real. Don’t let your hardship define who you are. Don’t struggle alone. Turn your struggles into your testimony. Let God use you!
I was challenged sooooo many times over the last couple of years. The devil tried to steal my joy on multiple occasions. I will be totally transparent with you! There were days where I let him. It hurts to think about those times, but my struggles made me who I am. God’s grace lifted me out of those dark days, and look where we are now! I will also admit that I still struggle with the thought of it all being taken away. The sweet baby doing flips and sucking their thumb in my tummy is such an incredible part of our testimony, our story, that God has so delicately written. I am so thankful that my faith is way BIGGER than my fears!! I’m thankful that I am not alone. Please know that you aren’t either!
I’ve had several people reach out to me since hearing about our story. Some are just beginning their journey and some are well into it. I have another piece of advice. BE CAREFUL what you say!! Be sensitive. Be kind. I may go into further depth on this subject later, but for now, that’s all I have to say!
Soooo, as of today, I’m 16 3/7 weeks!! Pregnancy has treated me pretty well so far! I did not have morning sickness Praise the LORD!! I did feel worse in the evenings during my first trimester and felt tired ALL THE TIME! I still feel tired, but it definitely got better after 12 weeks! I told Nicholas my teeth might just have to rot while I’m pregnant because just the thought of it makes me gag! I did start eating better in the last month and actually wanting to eat healthier foods again.
I’m loving the fact that there’s a tiny human growing inside of me. Some days it still doesn’t feel real! My regular jeans wouldn’t button starting at about 13 weeks, so watching my tummy grow has made it more real! I have had several people offer me maternity clothes which has been great, I am so thankful! I also bought a couple of pairs of maternity jeans in cali last week and man, those things are AMAZING!!
Our last check-up was at 13 weeks and we did not have an ultrasound done that day, which was weird. I had 4 vaginal ultrasounds between 5-10 weeks with my fertility doc. A perk to my job though is having the labor and delivery nurses take a peek at our little one!! So I have gotten to see him/her multiples times since then. I could sit and watch that squirmy lil baby ALL day!! Baby is also sucking their thumb just about every time we take a peek!!
To say our family and friends are excited is an understatement!! There’s a little someone who asks about Baby every single day and that’s my sweet Annie Clare. She has to see baby when we FaceTime, and she has to give Baby a kiss before we hang up. It literally makes my heart melt every single time. I can’t wait to see how she loves and cares for our sweet baby!
Our due date is July 31st!! It’s already going by so fast! So much to think about and so much to do! I have lots of pictures to share, so I will try to do better with my updates!! Thanks for continuing to pray for us! Life is still a bit complicated with trying to sell our house and not knowing exactly what the future holds. All I know is that it holds this precious baby, and God holds the key!!